Comics

“Did I Win?”

“Women just tend to be weaker than men. It’s just biology.”

Maria stood there annoyed. She and this guy, Richard have been arguing about this for while now. He kept insisting he wasn’t trying to be demeaning, but her anger showed she didn’t believe him. If she didn’t calm down she might do something she might regret—

“I challenge you to a boxing match!”

Oh no.

Richard laughs. Then stops. “Wait… you’re serious?”

“Yep. You in?”

“Wha-? No. That’s ridiculous. I’d hurt you.“ Unsatisfied with his answer she needles at him. And needle at him…And needle at him…until they are both in the ring.

“HA! I knew I’d wear you down.”

“Honestly I figured you’d just back out once the reality of the situation set in. …Guess not.”

The match starts. Maria runs straight towards him and lands a hit…! Which he absorbs without trouble. Maria continues to throw punches while Richard continues to take them no problem. He’s not putting up a fight though he’s not giving in either. He’s just standing there, unable to do much without harming the overconfident girl.

Their friends David and Cordelia watch from the sidelines were a large crowd has formed to watch. Maria shouts “Cmon! Do something!” But Richard isn’t stupid. He won’t budge.

After much hitting and yelling at him, bordering on a tantrum, Maria tires out and stops.

“Just—“ she huffs, “—Throw a punch already!”

Richard shrugs and lightly pushes her over.

She falls and crowd suddenly comes to life!

“He hit her!”

“You can’t do that!

“She’s so small!”

Their anger was ignored and Richard began to walk off.

“Now—Now hold on a minute!”

Maria had gotten back up.

“Maria. It’s over. Let’s just go home.”

“You may THINK this is over but I know how I can get you to fight me!”

He’s amused “Oh really?”

“Yes really! All I need to say is that— you’re ugly!”

A pause. Richard is completely unfazed.

“You’re fat?” He is clearly not fat.

“Curse you reality!” She thought.

“Aight, look, I’m just gonna head out.”

“Wait—“ She stops. Thinks.

“Top Gun is pure homoerotism and no one can tell me otherwise!”

He stops. Inhales sharply. “You don’t mean that.”

She smiles. “I do.”

He charges full force at her! And! And he… stops right in front of her and explains how the assumption that any close male bonding of any sort such as in Top Gun is inherently gay is not only wrong but stops men being in brotherly relationships as to not have those relationships misconstrued.

“And the more it gets pushed the farther apart these friendships get. Until suddenly you can’t get close to anyone because once there’s always some ignorant chick who thinks she’s helping and she’s all like ‘Oh just come out already UwU’ cause she thinks gay and suddenly it’s all over the whole school and no one believes you when you tell them we’re not dating cause you’re still best friends and even you’re dad doesn’t believe you—.”

“Your dad?”

And then you move schools cause the bullying gets to be too much. And you get older and you and your friend reconnect but til then you’re just sad and insecure and lonely and… and…”

“Rich…?”

Rich then collapses onto the floor overcome with sadness over his youth.

The match is over.

The crowd stands confused and uncomfortable.

And Richard is now on the ground being comforted by David.

“Who cares if people thought we were gay? They don’t matter. They were idiots, Rich.”

Cordelia stands next to Maria. “Well…you won.”

Maria looked at Richard. “Uh…I don’t think I did.”

End.